The "Body Check": Why Your To-Do List is Trying to Kill You (And How to Stop It)

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I blog about any and everything—women’s empowerment, health, the deep-seated feelings we usually hide behind a "fine, thanks." But lately? I haven’t felt like much of anything.

I’ll be real: I’ve been putting my self-care so far on the back burner it was basically in the neighbor’s yard. And my body? She finally had enough. She didn’t send a polite email; she staged a full-blown coup. It started with a three-week asthma flare-up that had me sounding like a croupy baby, and then—just for spice—an excruciating toothache that has me counting the minutes until the dentist can save my soul.

Sitting there, drained and throbbing, I realized I’d been running on fumes. As a single mom of two working 40+ hours a week, my weekend "me-time" is usually just five minutes of staring blankly at the wall behind the tv.

Ladies—married, single, or "it’s complicated"—we have to stop being the last item on our own lists. If we don't put ourselves at the top, our bodies will eventually pull the plug for us. Here are four ways to reclaim your throne, from "free-ish" to "treat-yo-self."

1. The "Pre-Kid" Quiet (Before the Chaos)

  • The Budget Version: Set your alarm 15 minutes before the "Mom, where's my laptop?" sirens go off. Drink your coffee while it’s actually hot. Do not—I repeat, do not—open your emails. This is your 15 minutes of being a human being before you become a snack-retrieval robot.

  • The Splurge: Upgrade the experience. If you’re going to be up at 6:00 AM, do it in a pretty and comfortable pajamas or with a high-end coffee machine that makes you feel like you’re at a Parisian cafe instead of in your kitchen with a pile of dirty dishes. I must admit, I love my coffee machine and the simplicity of it. The coffee comes out perfect and I can sit and enjoy it each time. 

2. The Health "Board Meeting"

  • The Budget Version: Stop "squeezing in" the doctor. Treat your dental cleanings and asthma check-ups like a meeting with the CEO. If you wouldn't cancel on your boss, don't cancel on your lungs. Don't cancel on your teeth. I have decided nothing hurts more than a toothache. Ive had children, I can make that statement. Fight me. 

  • The Splurge: The Wellness "Deep Clean." Book that professional deep-tissue massage or a vitamin IV drip. Think of it as an oil change for your soul. You aren't "pampering" yourself; you’re performing essential machinery maintenance. For a little adventure, book a service at a medspa. Go for the medically aesthetic experience. You will thank yourself. (If you need a recommendation for a medspa in the Detroit area, inbox me.....I have you covered.)

3. The Boundary Audit (The Power of "No")

  • The Budget Version: Practice this phrase: "That sounds lovely, but I’m at capacity." It costs $0 to say no to that extra volunteer shift or the birthday party you really don't want to attend. And you have to mean it. Giving people can cave. The power of no is very important for self-care. 

  • The Splurge: Buy back your Saturday. Hire a cleaning service for a one-time "reset" or use a meal-prep delivery for the week. There is no greater luxury than a Saturday afternoon where you aren't scrubbing a toilet or chopping onions.

4. The Sensory Reset

  • The Budget Version: The "Locked Bathroom" Retreat. A bag of Epsom salts, a candle that smells like a place with no children, and a podcast. If they knock, pretend you can’t hear them over the "therapeutic vibrations" of the tub. For added relaxation, play some soft music to help you relax. 

  • The Splurge: The Solo Staycation. One night in a local hotel. No laundry, no "What’s for dinner?", and a bed you don't have to share with a toddler's foot. It’s amazing how much more you like your family after 24 hours of not seeing them.

Let's Be Real...

I’m tired of us being "strong." I want us to be healthy and happy.

Your Turn: What is one "selfish" thing you’re going to do this week to keep yourself at the top of the list? Are you taking a 20-minute nap, or are you finally booking that flight? Drop your self-care "crime" in the comments so we can all get inspired!

Comments

  1. AnonymousApril 9, 2026 at 9:51 PM

    As a new mom who doesn’t shower until 10 with my eyes closed and eat at 3am when i remember… THANK YOU! I needed this reality check. I will be booking that massage THIS WEEKEND!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JocelinApril 9, 2026 at 10:40 PM

      Great! Now I need to follow my advice. But first I have to get this tooth fixed!!

      Delete

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